Like many people in high-pressure environments, I thought fulfilment came from constant striving: the more I wanted, the harder I worked, the more successful I thought I’d feel. That mindset was ingrained early on from my professional sports days, training for the GB Olympic team, where pushing limits was part of everyday life. It took me a while to realise that what drives you forward in competition can quietly burn you out in the real world.

A few years ago, it hit me that the same drive that once helped me perform was now pushing me towards burnout. It wasn’t sustainable for me, my team, or the people relying on me. Something had to change.

Through some honest (and at times quite tough) soul searching with Insight Executive’s brilliant coaches, here are six lessons I’ve learned to unlearn that I would like to share:

1. Challenge the “work hard, play hard” myth

Across so many industries, particularly recruitment, alcohol and long nights are often seen as part of the culture. But you don’t need it to belong. Try going out and staying present, not plastered. The conversations are better, the laughs are still loud, and the next morning feels a lot more productive.

2. Redefine what progress looks like

“No pain, no gain” sounds motivating until it burns you out. Whether it’s in the gym or at work, progress isn’t about pushing to breaking point.

One of the most valuable things I’ve learned is that sometimes good is good enough. Not every week needs to be a record breaker. When you’re constantly juggling and aiming to be your best, it’s easy to forget that a good week is still progress. Give yourself a break.

3. Control what you can and park what you can’t

Clarity comes when you stop fighting what’s outside your control and focus on what’s within it.

One of the most useful life guides I’ve ever been given is a simple framework:
What can I control? What can I influence? What’s outside my control?

4. Ask for support sooner

You don’t have to do it all yourself. Lean on others, especially when frustration starts to build. Staying quiet and bottling things up only amplifies stress and isolation. The first step toward feeling lighter is often just saying the words out loud.

5. Check in on the people who seem “fine”

Often the people who appear strong, confident and fine are the ones quietly carrying the heaviest loads. A single call or message might be the moment someone finds the courage to ask for help, or simply to feel seen in a busy world.

6. Lead by listening

Many people think leadership means being the loudest voice in the room. In reality, the best leaders I’ve met, and the ones I try to emulate, listen first. They create space for others to be heard and for ideas to form. Pausing to listen with intent is often where the magic starts to unfold.

Final thought

I realise these messages will have been said before, but I’ve heard that people need to hear something seven times before it sticks or clicks, so here’s me doing my bit for repetition folks.